Podcast Anyone?

What a couple of days it’s been for me, I’m absolutely shattered and enjoying a few hours downtime. I managed to get home very late from work, and with very sore feet to Mrs Bob.  After spending time eating tea, relaxing and doing some work it was gone 01.00am, so I decided to try to get some sleep as I had to be back on the early shift in the morning.

I have now got time to put my feet up while I toy with a few ideas regarding my blog, social media etc. I am considering doing a podcast as well as my blogging etc. I need to consult with a few of my closest friends, as I have a tendency to make rash and sometimes bad decisions. So stay tuned and watch this space.

Stay Safe X

The Doctor Will See You Now.

What can I say about today…? It began with a very unusual lie-in until 09.15, which is very unusual for me. I’m usually awake and out of bed by around 07.30-08.30, much to the annoyance of Mrs Bob, and making us a coffee. It’s kinda my routine:  get up make us both a coffee, chat and then make myself some breakfast. This had a knock on effect, as it meant that I felt like I was playing catch up.  On top of this, I’ve not been feeling 100% physically.

First stop on my fun-packed day off was a trip to the dentist. I, like most people (I’m guessing) hate going to the dentist. For me it’s a lot of things – going to somewhere I don’t like being, having to sit in a waiting room with all the other people as they try to make eye contact and small talk, And they think you’re rude when you can’t converse with them. I don’t like all the strange smells and sounds – the whole place smells very clean and disinfected, which I normally wouldn’t mind, but this is over the top clean-smelling. The sounds are something else too, Lights, air conditioning, water coolers, etc, but then there is the sound of the dental tools which makes me very nervous. That’s before I have even seen the dentist himself  with his latex gloves, the prodding, scraping and polishing and all the while expecting small talk. You can see why I don’t like it.

Then home for a quick bite to eat and pick my cat up. I’ve had her for so long she is part of the family.  I got her from an animal shelter as no one wanted her as she had a weird looking eye and is black and no one wants black cats for some reason. I’m not sure if is superstition or a colour thing. She is nearly 15 years old has only one eye and is very clingy. I have to take her to see the vet every 6 months just to make sure she is doing ok. This was not too bad, as the waiting room was empty and free of dogs… did I mention I have a phobia of dogs?  The cat got the all clear and has been given some blood pressure tablets. We are still worried about her though.

So after all that, I’ve managed to get a little relaxation time, cleaning my car, a lovely meal with Mrs Bob, some online gaming and finished off with a nice hot bath and a podcast.

Stay Safe X

See Me After Class

It seems that the summer vacation has, for me and many others, ended and we are back to another semester of English classes. For those of you who don’t know, I am actually now enrolled on a course to imoreover my English. As a dyslexic writer, blogger and somewhat of a poet, I thought that it might be helpful to learn to actually correct my own writing or at least make my English better so that it’s less work and less stressful for my proofreader, Mrs Bob, who is a fully trained proofreader (and a grammar freak though she doesn’t check this blog)… but shhh don’t tell her I said that, eh.

Before we broke up for the summer holidays I had been doing an English course once a week and had managed to get to grips with a class full of strangers (OK 6 but it’s still a big deal) and managing to cope. Imagine my horror when not only was I a week late back due to an organisational issue (I’m not very organised is the issue) but that the class was now 11 people and only 2 of them I knew from before. This was going to be a very long class and I felt very uncomfortable to say the least.

My anxiety levels were rising fast. I had people sat next to me I didn’t know or had said could invade my personal space. One teenage lad with an emo look was sat across the class and every time I looked up, he was staring at me. I have to wonder if this was real or perceived by my Asperger’s making me almost like a paranoid android. Then I happened to make a comment to the lecturer about disability markers on a form I was filling in, as it had ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder) as one and Aspergers Syndrome as another. All I said was I found this strange, as Aspergers is technically on the ASD.  At which point the 17 year old next to me said “Asperger’s is nothing to do with ASD”.  I went to disagree and she continued “I should know my friends brother thinks he has it!”

Well that’s OK then, you’re perfectly placed to make that statement.  Maybe the English Psychiatrist’s Society would like to take note of this ground-breaking research!! For those who are struggling, I’m being sarcastic. I’ve only lived with this gift/curse (you choose) for nearly 40 years and I like to think that I have some awareness of what it is. This class is going to be very hard work  – that is, if I manage to stick it.

Stay safe x

So Little Time.

Tuesday was a very busy day as far as days off go. I had lots of places to be and not much time to do it, First off a 10 mile trip to see my favourite tattoo artist (yes it’s an art). They are very talented and really friendly. My usual artist has a love of Kevin Smith, which means a great chat and some amazing ink. The design is something that I started last year as a tribute to my wife. It’s a nerdy type design that means something to Mrs Bob and myself and no one else. Then I had to wait for Mrs Bob to finish with a client before moving onto the next thing on the list. Next stop back home so I could walk down to my local comic book store. They are having a special event on soon and I wanted to buy a ticket before they sell out, also I love supporting my local comic book store for a number of reasons. They are a small local store and I prefer to fund mom and pop business over large corporations. The staff are very friendly, passionate and knowledgeable about what they sell. Alongside the fact they know I’m an Aspie and make allowances for it.

Back home to try and do some promotional type work on the old (not so) social media for the book and my blog. This is something I try to deal with myself rather than outsourcing it. This is because I’m passionate about what I do and my ideas, and to be honest I don’t trust anyone with my baby. Then I had to get in a new graphic designer, I’m looking for a logo for my writing side of things so as to be taken seriously a Poet/Blogger. What with the upcoming release of my book, “Behind the Mask” and then the work will begin on my second, as yet untitled book, which will be based on my blogging. I am finding this path to be a very exciting and interesting journey into what life with Aspergers can be like in our modern and hectic world.

Stay Safe X

Working Time.

Monday was a very strange and unusually quiet day at work. The area is quietening down, as the schools have gone back. We now have a few weeks of the older generation and those without kids enjoying the less hectic holiday season.

Quietness is a double-edged sword for me. I don’t have to wear myself out with eye contact and the small talk that I find so difficult and tiring. On the other hand I find that when I’m by myself and bored, my brain starts to work overtime with facts and figures. It was at this point that I remembered a paper I had been working on back in 2009-2010 that covered this situation.

Basically it looked at the way a neurotypical brain could perceive time in certain situations. I’m sure that you’ve heard the phrase that time flies when you’re having fun? Well basically I had started to look at this, and the fact that when you’re at work, time can drag. Let’s take 3 hrs for example – it’s a standard unit of time. Broken down to its base rate, it’s 10800 seconds.  It’s a constant number that can’t change. So why does our brain alter time or our perception of it?

Our perception of time changes with age, but it also depends on our emotional state. Research is steadily improving understanding of the brain it’s circuits that control this sense. Time is an integral part of our daily life, regardless of whether we are in a hurry, relaxed, gripped by an emotion or bored stiff. We may be walking, driving, listening to music, hearing the phone ring, taking part in a conversation or doing a sport, but time is always there, omnipresent and immaterial. Whereas all our senses – sight, touch, hearing, smell and taste – bring into play specialised sensory receptors, there is no specific receptor for time. Yet it is present in us, our brain being a real timing machine, giving us the ability to alter time (or our perception of time). This basically was the idea behind the paper titled Working Time Directive, which was never finished but has come one step closer to fruition.

Stay Safe X

Thanks Mrs Bob

It’s been a couple of days since we last spoke, so what’s been happening in my life? Friday was a particularly quiet day. I had a day off so I could try and concentrate on my book as it’s almost at the point of completion and I really want to get it finished now. It has been proofread by the wonderful Mrs Bob and all the artwork is in place. It’s just a case of finishing my foreword and thank-yous and sending everything off.

This book will, without a shadow of a doubt, be the hardest and most personal thing that I have ever done. Putting everything out there for all to see, my innermost thoughts and feelings laid bare on paper for strangers to judge. Yes, as an Aspie I get the irony of saying that on a blog. Most of the scribbles (poems) written in this book were written before I was diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome. This was a darker time in my life when I had serious depression, so some of the book is hard going. I used my scribbles to try and get across how I was feeling emotionally and as a form of therapy.  It really helped.

I’m really nervous and excited about putting my work out into the public domain, as once it’s out there, there is no going back – no way of unseeing my words.  But I guess when you are as open as I am and will continue to be in my ramblings here, then what’s the worst that could happen? The book has inspired this blog and this blog a second book. Almost like a perpetual motion engine. “A perpetual motion machine is a hypothetical machine that can do work indefinitely without an energy source. This kind of machine is impossible, as it would violate the first and second law of thermodynamics.”

Laws of Thermodynamics explained

So it’s exciting to see where this whole journey will take me, but I can say no matter what happens I’m glad I took the chance. Also I’m so glad to have Mrs Bob – she is responsible for getting the idea of a book to where I am now. Also, for being on hand to proofread my book and polish it up.  Without her, it would be like this blog! (Mrs Bob doesn’t proof my blog hence all the errors) The ramblings of a dyslexic Aspie – so you guys owe her one too!

Stay Safe X