As it’s national poetry day I figured I’d share a scribble with you. I performed it for the first time at a poetry slam last year, just before I released my third anthology Alexithymia,

It’s called Stop.

Please, stop for a minute.

Yes, I’m talking to you. 

Don’t do what it is that,

You’re planning to do.

Let these words reach you

While I have your attention.

I won’t try to say that I know 

The things you’re going through.

Just know that this pain 

You’re feeling right now?

I’ve been there – reaching

For the solution in whatever 

Form it might take – cold steel,

Booze or pills. So, even though 

I don’t know you, we have, at this

Point, something in common.

I was twenty-seven the first time

I felt I was out of options. Taking

The ultimate step that day

When I tried to put myself away.

I felt like I was screaming inside.

Remember, I’ve been where you

Are. I’ve walked that mile in those

Shoes; I want you to know this:

You are stronger than you realise.

This is a fight you can win, even 

If your doubts drown everything 

Out, hold on a little longer. Stay.

Let me talk to you. Let my words

Through, even if you don’t 

Think you can do it. I’ll share

This pain; be a voice of reason.

You have better times ahead 

Believe me, try to see, I beg of

you. Don’t take your life. Instead,

Take my hand – we’ll do this together.

Well I’ve finally done it, I took part in my first ever poetry slam. I had spoken to the owner of my local comic book store about my scribbles and the idea of an event on #NationalPoetryDay was born.

The week before the event I must confess I was really not feeling my usual self. I wasn’t sleeping properly and began to get very nervous about the whole thing, more so than the last event I spoke at. This might have been because there were some very talented poets on the bill, and I felt I would be the kid at the grown-up table. This is probably down to suffering from Imposters Syndrome. Anyway, after a talk with Mrs Bob and my cousin, I decided that all I could do was prepare myself. This meant that the week of the event, I would go and see my stylist Marc Nichols – I would say barber, but I have no hair! I see him to get my beard trimmed and sculpted, and we usually have a gossip about comic books and computer games. I then took a detour to a clothes store for a nice new box fresh tshirt so that I’d look and feel good on the night

Then came the fun part of working out a set list, so to speak, then rehearse it and time it, so I knew what I was doing and how long it would take. I was really struggling to fill a 20-minute slot and began to feel stressed, until the store owner emailed and explained the format. We would have four minutes to perform each piece and we would lose a point for every minute we went over. This was just what I needed as it played to my strengths big time. I was now feeling so much better about it that I forgot all my nerves and everything else….. well, until the day of the event. I was really very nervous on the day and felt physically ill, but I knew I couldn’t back out and had to push forward. I did the only thing I could to relax – play video games and watch superhero TV shows until late on, then relax with a Masonic podcast while having a bubble bath. Might sound odd, but trust me, it works.

Then I got my beard oiled, my outfit ready and made sure I looked ready to play. We hit the road while listening to one of Detroit’s most prolific verbal illustrators/poets, Marshal Mathers III (Eminem) and I was then totally chilled out.

The event itself was really enjoyable. I was a little stressed at the point of standing up and reading my work in front of such verbally skilled peeps, and I didn’t sell myself or my book very well. My eyes even leaked at one of my own poems, but all in all I managed to do it and I’m taking that as a win for me.

I wouldn’t be able to do this event or any other if it wasn’t for Mrs Bob and her skills as my partner in crime and Scribblology. She is my everything. She’s also now known as the “Aspie Whisperer” so before I sign off I’d like to take this opportunity to thank her for all the love and support she provides me.

So that’s my first major milestone down and here’s to many more.

Stay Safe X