After all the fun and drama of Slapton Beach on Sunday (see Thar She Blows) and the fact that my date afternoon with Mrs Bob was so much fun and a great way to get out of the house,  I decided yesterday when I awoke that we should take some more time to do something similar again. Plus, on Monday a regular guest had informed me that the whale we had been searching for on Sunday had moved location to a place called Berry Head, which is not too far from us.  I’m still somewhat shocked that the whale couldn’t be bothered to update its location on FB or Twitter at least.. so much for the digital age!

We had a few things to deal with first, as I have certain routines that I have to complete on a Tuesday plus I had to get some test results from the doctors, which I was very anxious about, so I was very glad to get it over and done with.  After that, I did my usual bits and pieces, before saying to a very relaxed Mrs Bob “Right, are you ready?” – which she obviously wasn’t, as I had annoyingly sprung  this on her.  I’d had this whole scenario planned in my head but had forgotten to open my mouth.  I was ready and I expected her to be also. Luckily, she was completely up for it, so we got our binoculars, hats and coats and made our way to Berry Head and Brixham.

The drive to Berry Head was not really a very long drive but the last portion is one of Devon’s particular specialities: a single track road, which out of season can be a nuisance and in season a no-go area, especially on routes to some of our county’s beauty spots. We found a place to park at Berry Head with relative ease and began the walk. It was a nice afternoon with a little sunshine and a breeze and the walk was pleasant – not too hilly but dry underfoot.  This gave us the opportunity to take it easy, enjoy each other’s company and even share some thought-provoking conversation about our favourite subject: Science.  We also took the time to really appreciate the beautiful scenery that surrounded us and take some pictures – even the usual Husband and Wife selfie that we always take when we go out. I know, I know, at our ripe old  ages we shouldn’t be doing this selfie malarkey but it’s kind of a tradition that started when we first went to Blackpool Sands all those years ago.  We now have a nice collection of selfies from all of our trips and we love reviewing them.

We eventually reached the old fortified walls, cannons and lighthouse and took some time to read the various information signs that were up, as well as admiring the beautiful view across the Torbay. We had a look for the whale but, alas, after twenty minutes of searching it was nowhere to be found, so we enjoyed the views and decided to stop off for coffee and cake at the little but well-stocked coffee shop on the headland. This was a great call on the part of my wife, as they had salted caramel latte and I do love a fancy coffee. This was just what we both needed: a nice trip out and a chance to unwind and get some fresh air.  As a nice addition, when I looked at my phone’s pedometer app, I had managed to clock up quite a few steps!  That counteracted the cake and coffe I had splurged out on, and turned it into a healthy day for both of us, in both mind and body. A really lovely day.

Stay Safe X

Today after work I had a wonderful date afternoon with my long suffering wife Mrs Bob; his was a brilliant way to unwind.

Mrs Bob was waiting for me so she could take me out for our afternoon date, this was surprisingly (to those that know me) my idea and for a number of reasons a very lovely afternoon, firstly we don’t tend to go out over the weekend much as I work most of the weekend, secondly Mrs Bob is pretty autistic for an NT, as she doesn’t like going out and/or socialising.  She is also a member of the WDCT Whale and Dolphin Conservation Trust. This is especially relevant as I had made plans for us to travel up to Slapton beach to go whale watching as there has been a humpback spotted there over the last few days.  I knew my wife would love a chance to see it for herself, plus it gave us a chance to enjoy some time together as a couple.

It would appear that most of south Devon had the same idea and had tried to cram all their cars in the tiny and normally unused car park, We managed, luckily, to find a space,  got our binoculars out and began to scour the seas looking for this majestic creature to rear its head, Unfortunately, the only thing to raise its head was a very grumpy woman who decided to start being rude to someone who was standing next to us, over the seriously heinous crime of BAD PARKING.  Before he could ask if his parking was causing her a direct issue, she had stormed off. This prompted Mrs Bob and I to leave, as more and more cars were arriving and so before tempers could fray further, we left and went back to “the beginning”.

This will mean nothing unless you know the story of how Mrs Bob and I got together.  We went to Blackpool Sands, which is just down the coast from Slapton, when I first visited her, and fell in love with this wonderful county of Devon.  But that really is another very wonderful story and one I may write at a later date. Anyway, back to today and Blackpool Sands – we had a nice coffee and then decided to get the binoculars out and just watch the sea and have some us time.  To our surprise, though, our special venue decided to show us some dolphins or porpoises.

We had almost given up on seeing anything and had decided to go back to our favourite piece in our story to relax and have a mini date.  It would seem that the universe, or fate had decided to make it an even more magical day for us.

Stay Safe X

While I was looking over my website the other day, and trying to think how I could maybe edit the page or alter its visual layout to make it look better, or perhaps more welcoming or maybe, God forbid, professional. I happened to glance upon the beginning of this adventure the point where it all began some eight months or so ago with my very first post and it really got me thinking about a number of things…..

Firstly how far this little page, this idea had grown from being a single voice shouting into the dark abyss of the internet to where it is now, when I began this website and the associated social media pages that go with it. I was using the blog as a way of journalling how I manage to navigate the difficulties, and the way I see the world as someone on the Autism spectrum, and maybe raise some awareness of Autism Spectrum Disorder, while working on getting my new book of poetry (or scribbles as I call them, ready to be sent to the publisher.  This is no small feat, as I’m dyslexic and have had to get the amazing Mrs Bob to proofread and correct all the errors, of which I’m sure there were many.

Secondly, little did I know that in a few short months that nearly half a million of you lovely people would check out my blog.  That has really blown me away. I never thought that anyone would be interested in the ramblings of a forty year old Aspie and his mundane little life in the south west, I would, however, like to take this opportunity to say a very heartfelt thank you for taking the time to read my ramblings and even replying to them.

Finally a big thank you to all the followers on my social media pages (again I can’t believe how many of you there are) for all the hard work each and everyone of you put in by sharing, commenting and generally trying to help me in raising awareness of Aspergers and Autism Spectrum Disorder in general.  This really is half the struggle in this day and age, and I really couldn’t do it without the love and support of certain people so a personal thank you to my long suffering wife Mrs Bob, my close friends N,T and C and also to each and every one of you. Thank you so much for letting me be a part of your lives.

I would also on a separate note like to point out that this particular rambling is also a very special milestone one, it’s nearly my 100th posting….  here’s to many more.

Stay Safe X

This Sunday has seen the last of the indoor season with the archery club that I belong to. From now on, we will be shooting outdoors at our club’s ground as opposed to the indoor centre that we use over winter.  The hall is being remodelled, and so we are moving to the summer venue a little early. That means that due to the distance between the club and my work hours on a Sunday, I will have to stop shooting over the summer season until we begin using the indoor facilities again.

There is a downside to this scenario, which is that as I’m not being able to practice the sport I love for some months and this means that without practice my personal best (480 out of 600) and skills will surely deteriorate.  So I’m now at a crossroads and a dilemma. Do I take the summer off and hope that when we return to the indoor season I can get back up to speed and hope my scores don’t drop too much in the interim?  Or do I throw in the towel? (Note from wifety…. don’t give up hunny)

This week has been a different one than normal for a number of reasons.  My routine was out of whack for starters as I had Monday off work, which I don’t usually have. This made my Aspie mind struggle, as it felt like a Tuesday, which is my day off. I have a set routine of places I go, things I do and  I was having to do them on a Monday instead of Tuesday (as my long-suffering wife was going to get her very first tattoo on Tuesday). I was going with her to give her moral support as she was not sure what to expect. I have a fair bit of experience in the tattoo dept and was really happy to support her. Tuesday was a relatively nice day starting with the usual morning hot beverage and a nice relaxing drive to the studio.

While Mrs Bob was getting inked, which wasn’t going to be long, I caught up on some reading and reviewing for the nerdy stuff I do in my free time. I was really surprised by how quick the time went by and before I knew it she was done and dusted, and seemed to quite enjoy the whole thing. I must say that it looks very elegant and tasteful in my humble opinion.

This meant that by that afternoon I was back to my usual Tuesday routine, which includes a podcast session, some gaming and assorted stuff. The rest of the week was pretty much back to my normal routine which is something that I am very happy about. Today I have been pushing myself outside of my comfort zone big time but I will be enigmatic about that for now and leave that for another day.

I guess if anything, this week has taught me that you can be outside of your routine and or your comfort zone and it’s ok. It’s strange, confusing and can cause anxiety attacks, but it can be done. Why you would want to is the bit I can’t answer, but when it’s necessary… because life isn’t always predictable… it’s ok

Stay Safe X

This last week has taught me a  very valuable lesson about how the some of the world views autism. Fortunately for me, the majority of the population doesn’t really have any knowledge or understanding of autism and most people also don’t know that I have Asperger’s Syndrome – a form of higher functioning autism.  .

Unfortunately, my friends are aware, and they  have some very bizarre opinions on the subject. One has the attitude of “you can’t be autistic – you seem so normal”, which I know can upset some ASD people. But I’m kinda ok with that as it just means that I’ve somehow managed to learn how to fit in with people and engage with them socially. My other freindeer has taken a different approach and has begun teaming up with another “friend”. They have taken the “Rain Man” approach, thinking that all of us are the same as one character played by an actor in a film. Repeated jokes about dropping lots of items and being able to count them in seconds and I have a nice new shiny nickname of Raymond to boot. I can’t really say it bothers me that much, as I can see where they have got the idea from. They are both the kind of people that see someone like me, who is somewhat clever with a really good memory recall on lots of subjects and a love of science and comic books, and are possibly envious of how I see the world. After seeing both these different approaches, it made me think, how would they feel if the shoe was on the other foot? “It’s ok some of my best friends are Neruotypical” “You don’t seem Neurotypical” “NT is my second language”, etc.  I think they would soon get upset with it and ask for it to stop. Why don’t I give them a taste of their own medicine and hope that they get the message and stop it? Because I really don’t think it’s the right way to go about things and to be honest I’m better than that. I guess I feel sorry for them – they must have nothing going in their own lives, so they have to do this.

In short, with all that’s going on in the world, why don’t we all take some time out of our week and get to know an NT and try to help them to understand autism?  It’s not their fault they’re like it. Make some time for NT Awareness lol.

Stay Safe X

Well, after the absolute chaos that was my Saturday, Sunday was much easier on my mind and body,

As it was a nice day, and Mrs Bob was busy working in her office at home. I was almost on my way  home when I received an invitation from my best friend asking if I wanted to have a catch-up. We decided to meet in a pub in my town, got a table some (soft) drinks and caught up on what had been going on in our lives. It was so nice to just sit and begin the wind down that many take for granted on the weekend. It meant that when I got home to Mrs Bob, I was relaxed and ready to sit with her and watch our latest favourite TV show, Blindspot, which is brilliant and highly recommended.

Follow this with a sumptuous home-cooked feast at the hands of Mrs Bob, and some game time on my Xbox, and I think it’s been a perfect end to a good weekend. I hope you all had a great weekend whatever you chose to do with it, wherever and whoever you spent with…. if you can remember that far back now!

Stay Safe x

It’s been a very quiet week in the Bob household with nothing particularly noteworthy happening. On Tuesday, though, I decided to take a trip out to a nearby village to visit a tattoo studio that my freindeer has recommended countless times. I’ve been thinking of having an old tattoo covered over with a new, personal to me piece of art. I called into the studio and was expecting the usual “It’s going to take two hours and we can’t book you in for about a month”, standard line for most studios. Imagine my surprise when the artist (yes they are artists) said it would take an hour max and even better he had a cancellation this Friday (today), first thing. I couldn’t say no, so  I paid my deposit, gave the man his hand back and left with Mrs Bob.  We drove back home via the supermarket for some bits ‘n’ pieces and some goodies.

The rest of my day off was spent sending emails, tweets, etc, and generally looking after my nerdy web empire (lol). Before I knew it, l I was back in the chair getting some more ink. I was up bright and early Friday morning and raring to go – unlike Mrs Bob who, unfortunately for her, had to come with me as I’m not very good on my own in strange places. I had a great time chatting to the artist about comic books, TV series and movies while he worked his magic. The only thing that hurt was not from having the tattoo done, as I find it very relaxing, but the noise of the tattoo gun. It was right next to my ear and at points it was really painful. The time flew by, though, and it was soon time to stand up, look in the mirror, have my arm wrapped up and go downstairs to meet Mrs Bob and pay for the work.

Imagine my surprise when I got downstairs to find that Mrs Bob had booked herself in for her her first tattoo ever! In a couple of weeks. So I’m going to be going back with her for moral support.

Stay Safe X

Yesterday saw one of the longest days I have had in an eternity. I know that, as a man, I maybe have a knack of exaggerating things, but I think that on this occasion even the long-suffering Mrs Bob would agree with me.

It began with an early start at 6.30am, which is early when you consider that I had been working until late the night before and we didn’t get to sleep until nearly 1am. So, this two-day road trip would see us cover over 500 miles and some of the most monotonous driving ever including the entire M5.  The trip “up north” was mainly to attend a family funeral, but we also managed to see my family while we were up that way. We have made this trip about 30 times in the last few years and it usually takes us 3.5 hours. This trip, however, took about 5 hrs with one quick pit-stop to refuel the car.

When we finally arrived at my parent’s house, we were literally straight in and then back out the door and my parents drove us to their favourite restaurant, where they had booked a table, as we hadn’t seen them since we were up in early September last year. Also, as it had been my mothers birthday a couple of days earlier, she wanted to treat us. We had a wonderful meal and some great conversation, but it felt a little rushed as we had to also fit in picking up my daughters from two different parts of town and spend time with them as well. The other down side (not for me) was that after picking the kids up, we were taking them out for a meal so this meant having another meal a couple of hours after the last one. I had a nice chat with the kids, caught up on gossip and then dropped them back at home.  This meant that we could check into our hotel after a day of being inside a small Japanese car. We needed a good night’s sleep as we had a full day of driving and a funeral to attend the following day. I headed to the bar for one stiff drink (very unusual for me) before turning in for the night.

The next morning, we got up early and I got suited and literally booted ready for the family funeral later that day. We decided to call in and see my parents again on the way, as we won’t see them again for possibly a year. Then onward 40 miles to pay our respects to a member of Mrs Bob’s family. We were first to arrive, and sat in the crematorium waiting room.  It soon filled up and when it got to standing-room only, my head started to spin with all the different conversations that were taking place around us. So we decided so wait outside… though as it turns out,that was a mistake as it was just as busy outside. The service itself was so different to any I had attended before; the minister addressed the deceased directly and spoke to the family in a very light and not overly religious way. It was very fitting and appropriate.  The chapel was full to bursting with family and friends and was a lovely testament to the life this man had lived.  He really had lived a full and happy life, touched so many people and helped a huge amount of rescue dogs find forever homes through The Dog’s Trust. The rest of the family were all so brave and so very strong, I really don’t know how his wife and young adult daughter managed it, I honestly don’t. They are made of strong stuff indeed.

After such a lovely service we all went to the after-party to celebrate a great man and a great life. There was lots of people there and we ate, drank and talked for hours before finally deciding to make the long journey back to Devon. The trip itself was long and dark, but ultimately uneventful. Mrs Bob and I had  some great conversation and some happy silences while we listened to the radio as the hours and miles ticked by. We reached home and no sooner had Mrs Bob opened the door than our furry housemate, Dog, flew out of the darkness and into the house to tell us what had happened while we were away. As it was pretry late, we climbed on the bed with Dog clambering over us, for cuddles and just relaxed watching some TV before calling it a night. We were both shattered.

Stay Safe X

Well as the new year breaks like a crashing wave on the shores of time, w make our promises and resolutions that this new year will be the year we improve ourselves or our lives in some way.

Most of these resolutions last until maybe the end of January at best. Why do we give up on them though? Is this possibly because we set ourselves unrealistic goals? I’ve decided to set myself a target this year, I’m looking to lose a little weight – not a huge amount, but just drop down a couple of sizes on the waist. Can this be achieved or am I like many others just deluding myself with the whole New Year New Me?  Well we shall see I have set myself a challenge to cut my sugar intake in half and to go for a walk everyday. Will this make any difference? We shall see.

Stay Safe X