If you’d asked me 15 years ago what “risk” looked like, I’d probably have pictured something dramatic.

You know the sort of thing…
Skydiving.
Quitting a job on a whim.
Throwing caution to the wind and hoping the universe catches you.

But life—real life—rarely deals in those neat, cinematic moments. It’s usually quieter than that. Messier. Less obvious. 

And the biggest risk I ever took?

Well that was packing up what I owned, and everything I knew… and moving all the way to Devon.

Not for a job.
Not for convenience.
Not because it made perfect, logical sense on paper.

But for her.

Mrs Bob.

Now, I won’t dress it up as some grand heroic leap.

It didn’t feel brave at the time.

It felt… uncertain.

Leaving behind the familiar—your routines, your places, the little corners of the world that feel like yours—it has a way of rattling you. Even more so when you’re someone who already finds the world a bit loud, a bit overwhelming at the best of times. 

There’s comfort in the known.
Safety in the predictable.

And I walked away from that.

Because sometimes life gives you a choice.

Stay where it’s safe…
Or go where your heart is pulling you.

And the truth?

I didn’t know how it would turn out.

There was no guarantee. No neat little roadmap. No voice from above saying, “Go on, this one works out.”

Just a feeling.

A quiet, stubborn certainty that this was someone worth risking it for.

And here’s the part that matters.

I don’t regret it. Not for a second.

Because what I found wasn’t just a new place—it was a life.

A shared one.

The kind built in small, ordinary moments… the kind I’ve come to realise matter far more than any grand plan. The routines, the laughter, even the occasional chaos—those are the things that quietly shape a life into something meaningful. 

People talk about risk like it’s all adrenaline and big gestures.

But sometimes…

The biggest risks are the quiet ones.

The ones where you choose love over certainty.
Where you step into the unknown, not because you’re fearless—but because something matters more than the fear.

Moving to Devon was one of those moments.

A gamble, if you like.

But some gambles don’t feel like losing, even when they’re uncertain…

Because you already know what you’re choosing.

And I’d choose it again.

Every single time.

Stay safe,
BC

I didn’t leave the first time.

And that sentence sits heavier than it should.

It’s strange, the things we convince ourselves of in the moment.

“That wasn’t really what it looked like.”
“They didn’t mean it.”
“It won’t happen again.”

We build these little stories—not because they’re true, but because they’re easier to live with. 

Because the alternative?
That’s messy. That’s terrifying. That means change.

Looking back now, the warning signs weren’t subtle.
They never are, really.

They just get quieter the longer you ignore them.

Or maybe… you get better at pretending you can’t hear them.

If I could go back—if I could stand in that exact moment again, knowing what I know now—

I wouldn’t argue.
I wouldn’t explain.
I wouldn’t wait for it to make sense.

I’d leave.

No grand speech.
No dramatic ending.

Just… leave.

Because staying didn’t fix anything.

It just taught me how much I was willing to tolerate before I finally chose myself.

And that’s a lesson I wish I’d learned sooner.

Sometimes growth isn’t about what you did.

It’s about what you didn’t do…
and finally understanding why you should have.

Stay safe

Bc

1.5 million males, aged 16 years and over, experienced domestic abuse in the last year (stats from ONS uk)

https://www.nationaldahelpline.org.uk/

After a long day, when the noise finally dies down and the world stops asking things of me…

I like to keep it simple.

A quiet game of chess — just me, the board, and a few moves ahead to think about.

And then… quality time with Mrs Bob.

No grand plans. No fuss.

Just that steady, familiar calm that puts everything back where it belongs.

Stay Safe

Bc

I’m not here to preach about algorithms or strategies. No complex tutorials, no tips for “growing your following.” I’ve always believed in keeping things simple. So here it is, straight from the heart:

I use social media to raise awareness of my poetry and photography. That’s it.

I’m not chasing likes or trying to go viral. I don’t have a content calendar or a carefully crafted aesthetic. What I do have is a passion for my craft, and social media is the platform I use to share it with you. It’s as simple and raw as that.

Platforms like Instagram and TikTok are my canvas. They’re not perfect — they’re messy, sometimes chaotic, but that’s what makes them real. They let me share my work, let it breathe, and find its way into the lives of people who might never have found it otherwise.

And that’s the magic of it. It’s not about being polished or chasing numbers; it’s about creating a space for my poetry and photography to live and evolve in real-time, without the constraints of traditional publishing.

Sometimes, a post will be nothing more than a quick snapshot of a fleeting moment, paired with a line that feels just right. Other times, I’ll share a more personal reflection — a deeper dive into the thoughts behind the work. But each time, it’s about sharing the essence of what I do.

No bells, no whistles. Just me, my art, and the quiet hope that it resonates with someone out there.

So, how do I use social media? I use it to share what’s in my heart. To give my poems and photos a home beyond the walls of my studio and to create something real and unfiltered, just for you.

And if one of my words or images makes you pause, even for a second, then I know it’s all worth it.

That’s how I use social media. Simple, honest, and always from the heart.

Stay Safe 

Bc

Pull up a chair, grab a brew… this one still makes me smile in that quiet, “well… that escalated quickly” sort of way.

It started, like a lot of things did in those days, with a bit of mindless scrolling.

No expectation. Just me, half-paying attention to the world through a glowing rectangle, letting my thumb do most of the thinking. Twitter had a way of being like that — a digital high street where you can walk past a thousand things and not remember a single one five minutes later.

Except… this time, I stopped.

There she was.

A random woman, somewhere out there in the universe, holding a book on string theory like it was the most natural thing in the world. Not posed. Just… real. The kind of photo that doesn’t try too hard, and because of that, says more than it should.

Now, I knew a little about string theory. It’s one of those subjects that makes your brain feel like it’s trying to fold in on itself, and I love it. 

I have to say there was something about the way she held that book — like she wasn’t intimidated by it. Like she was perfectly comfortable sitting in the middle of something vast and complicated and saying, “Yeah… I’ll give this a go.”

And that stuck with me.

So, in a moment of what I can only describe as reckless curiosity. 

 I replied.

Nothing clever.
Nothing rehearsed.
Just a comment about the book… and maybe a a flirtatious comment dressed up as a joke.

I expected nothing back.

Because that’s the unwritten rule of the internet, isn’t it?
You shout into the void… and the void politely ignores you.

But this time… it didn’t.

She replied.

And here’s the thing — it wasn’t just a reply. It was one of those responses that had weight to it. Warmth. A little spark of humour. The kind that makes you sit up a bit straighter and think, “Alright… maybe there’s a conversation here.”

So we carried on.

One message turned into a few.
A few turned into daily check-ins.
Daily check-ins turned into conversations that somehow stretched from “how’s your day been?” to “what do you think happens to us when we’re gone?” without either of us really noticing the shift.

You know the kind.

The ones where hours pass like minutes.
Where the world goes a bit quieter around the edges.
Where you realise you’re looking forward to a notification more than you probably should.

And somewhere in all of that… this stranger stopped being a stranger.

She became part of the rhythm of my days.

Now, life doesn’t tend to do things in straight lines. It zigzags. It throws in the odd plot twist just to keep you on your toes. But every now and then, it gets something quietly, wonderfully right.

We met.

Properly met.

No screens. No buffering. No carefully typed responses you can edit three times before sending. Just two people, standing there, slightly awkward, slightly nervous… and somehow already knowing each other in a way that didn’t need much explaining.

And it worked.

Not in the fireworks and movie soundtrack kind of way.

In the real way.

The “cups of tea and comfortable silence” way.
The “you stay, I’ll stay” way.
The kind that builds slowly, steadily… like it’s got no intention of going anywhere.

And somewhere along the line — between the messages, the meetings, the ordinary days that didn’t feel ordinary anymore — that random woman on Twitter…

Became my wife.

Funny, isn’t it?

You can spend years looking for something.
Trying to plan it.
Trying to understand it.

And then one day… it just shows up.

Holding a book you don’t completely understand,
on an app you weren’t really paying attention to,
at a moment you almost scrolled past.

Goes to show…

Sometimes the best things in life don’t kick the door in.

They just appear quietly in your feed,
tap you on the shoulder,
and change everything.

Stay safe
Bc

I didn’t always take a step back. In fact, I was quite the opposite. I used to be quick to anger, quick to react, and even quicker to lash out without really thinking it through. The kind of person who would fire back in the moment, only to replay it all later and wonder if I’d made things worse, which I usually had.

So a while back, I made a decision that, on the surface, didn’t look like much. I decided to read up on Wicca and Buddhism. Originally I wasn’t looking to convert, but simply to understand. To see if there was something in those pages that might quiet the noise a little.

What I found wasn’t some grand revelation or lightning bolt moment. It was quieter than that. Subtler.

A shift.

Through those readings, I started to understand the idea of letting go. Not in a careless way, but in a deliberate one.

The notion that not everything needs my reaction. Not every slight needs to be answered. Not every storm needs me to stand in the middle of it shouting back at the wind.

There’s a kind of peace in stepping aside and letting things unfold as they will.

It echoed something I’ve come to believe over time—that life is fragile, and perspective changes when you’ve seen enough of it to know how little control we really have. 

So now, when something happens—when someone says something they shouldn’t, or life throws one of its usual curveballs—I try (not always successfully) to pause.

To breathe.

To remind myself that karma, or the universe, or whatever name you want to give it, has a way of balancing things out without my interference.

And in doing so, I’ve grown.

Not because I’ve stopped caring, but because I’ve learned where to place that care. Less in the chaos, more in the calm.

Stay safe
BC

Father.

No… that word doesn’t sit right.

I suppose biological father or sperm donor is more accurate.

Because a father is something more than blood, more than just a surname, more than a man who happened to be there at the beginning.

A father stays.

You didn’t.

For years, I carried the anger of that.

The broken promises.

The empty chair.

The waiting.

God, the waiting.

That horrible ache of being a child watching the clock, listening for footsteps, for a knock at the door, for the sound of a car pulling up outside, convincing yourself this time he’ll come.

And then the slow, crushing realisation that once again, he wasn’t coming.

Again.

And again.

And again.

People talk about what family gives us.

Love.
Support.
Guidance.
Strength.

Sometimes what family gives us is a wound.

And sometimes, if we survive it, that wound becomes wisdom.

The most positive thing my biological father ever did for me was teach me exactly how not to be a father.

That sounds harsh.

Maybe it is.

But it’s also the truth.

Because every time I hold my children close, I know what it means to be left standing in the cold.

Every time I answer the phone, turn up, keep my word, sit through the tears, the tantrums, the celebrations and the heartbreaks, I am doing so with the ghost of that lesson sitting on my shoulder.

I learned from the man who walked away what it means to stay.

I learned from neglect what presence looks like.

I learned from abandonment what love must feel like.

He taught me, without ever meaning to, that children remember everything.

They remember who came.

They remember who didn’t.

They remember who made them feel safe.

And they remember who made them question whether they mattered at all.

So I made a promise to myself long ago.

My children would never sit by a window waiting for me.

They would never have to invent excuses for my absence.

They would never lie to themselves to protect a heart too young to understand rejection.

I would be there.

Even on the hard days.

Especially on the hard days.

Because that’s what being a parent is.

It isn’t convenience.

It isn’t occasional appearances when it suits.

It is sacrifice.

It is consistency.

It is love in action.

And strangely enough, for all the hurt he caused, that lesson became one of the greatest gifts of my life.

Not because the pain was a gift.

Pain never is.

But because from that pain, I built something better.

A life rooted in presence.

A family built on promises kept.

A home where nobody wonders if they are loved.

So yes, if I’m asked what positive thing a family member has done for me, my answer remains the same.

My biological father taught me how not to be a father.

Stay Safe

Bc

Truth be told… it isn’t one.

Give me a table and a menu and I’ll probably spend more time people-watching than eating anyway. What I’m really after is a feeling — that quiet hum of life happening around you, the sense that you’ve stumbled into somewhere honest.

That’s why I’d pick a little café called Stacked, or the weekly market in Totnes.

Stacked is a quaint family owned cafe at the bottom of town. Where like in “Cheers” everybody knows your name, and your always guaranteed a warm welcome, before heading up the high street to the market square.

The Totnes Market has been running for centuries, (since 1206) and you can feel every bit of that history in the air — traders who’ve been there for decades, music drifting between stalls, and that wonderful unpredictability of never quite knowing what you’ll find. 

It’s not polished. It’s not curated. It just is.

A coffee in hand, something delicious in a paper tray, and the low murmur of conversations you’re not quite part of — that’s my kind of dining.

So no, not a restaurant.

Just a place with a bit of soul, where the food is almost beside the point.

Stay safe

Bc